Boy am I behind! But this weeks lesson was an exercise in taking a moment to check in with my self, with my body, with my head.
To see what I was feeling in that. exact. moment.
And it was tough.
Because like many of us, I will often lie to myself about how I am doing.
When some one asks you how you are - do you reply 'fine', or 'good'?
How often would that be true?
Imagine if you said "well actually my husband snored all last night so I am tired and cranky, and then I came down stairs and stubbed my toe on a my little pony, that I had asked to be put away 3 times, before my morning caffeine fix, so I not only am I cranky, I am pissed as well."
Imagine...
Anyway, I spent some time reflecting on myself, and at that moment, I felt unravelled, but instead of feeling anxious or stress, I realised that it was ok. I was ok.
So out of this feeling came this painting. 'I am unravelled and it's ok'
[as a side note, I have a friend who's a psychoanalyst who swears fine actually means fucked up, insecure, neurotic and/or emotional. Yep I think that sums up my use of the word fine]
Anyway, I felt such peace after finishing this painting.
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